Friday, February 7, 2014

This is my declaration of Independence from PRETEND-ALTERED-NEGATIVE-EGOTISTICAL-UNREALISTIC.

Blog Blog Blog, Post Post Post, Pin Pin Pin

I used to love to read peoples blogs and see into others lives, especially young moms like me or girls who make crafts and quilts and sew pretty things.

I used to love the feeling I would get reading friend and families posts on Face Book and feel "Connected" to the ones I love whom I feel so far from.

I used to love seeing how many "Likes" I could get on my posts.

I used to love to Instantly share my pictures with my girls grandparents and cousins.

I used to love to get googly eyed over the pictures on Pinterest of all the lovely recipes and the quick makeup ideas. The lovely decorated homes and the quilts and DIY projects.

I LOVED these things so much that I installed them on my phone, right there day and night, to read before bed and to read when I wake up and all throughout the day. At any second I could be connected....or is it DISTRACTED?

Here's the TRUTH for ME:

I now know that those pictures are positioned in a certain way that they look absolutely gorgeous and breathtaking but in real life, if I was there in your kitchen it most definitely wouldn't look that way. I know this because I post only the BEST, the MOST ATTRACTIVE. If we stage a room and have a professional photographer to take a photo-its going to look great!!!! Is this what I'm teaching my girls? It has to LOOK perfect? YOU Have to look pefect girls, your clothes and food and house and body and hair and makeup and decorations? 

I now know that SOME of these busy women are sewing and sewing and sewing and sewing. Gluing Gluing Gluing. Staying up late sewing, ignoring their kids, ignoring their husbands and spending so much money on all this stuff! I know, how do I know????  Been there!

I now know that opening Facebook only to see peoples boobs falling out of their shirts.complaints and horrible swearing isn't what I want to INVITE into my life day after day, neither is bragging. or Selfies or political opinions. Some of my friends and family wouldn't dare say those things to anyone's face in REAL LIFE......

So that's just isn't real life.....

I'm on a journey to find my real self worth and to love myself so I can love my husband better and love my little girls. I want them to have confidence in themselves JUST AS THEY ARE. That's what I want for myself too. I go The Emily Program every week trying to overcome an eating disorder  and childhood abuse that affects me to this day and to become my REAL TRUE AUTHENTIC self.  This is MY journey. 

I want to continue to document my sewing projects for myself and to see my progress. I love to make things for others and when I spend a long time on them and give them away I like having a photograph to remind MYSELF. I'll post those on SoILovetoSEW blog for MYSELF. and I'm not going to "POST" it on FB for hundreds to see. I'm not going to get all caught up in this stuff. It's consuming me. It may work for you but not for ME.
Today I'm cleaning out my Facebook Friends and only keeping my Friends you know? I"m also going to UNSUBSCRIBE from posts from all those I mentioned above. I did this a few weeks ago and I have a way better time when I am on Facebook. Theres some more cleaning up I need to do...Also I'm going to strive not to be one who posts negative, critical, political, egotistical etc. stuff. I WILL post Religious stuff because I love Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ and I believe they are the good and the happy in my life.

Today I'm cleaning up my Pinterest to things I think I may really actually like to make and do...I can't hold myself up to that's like thinking I can be Martha Stewart without her staff of 20 for each picture...and I"m going to delete Martha Stewart off of my following list on Pinterest..sheesh, what was I thinking?

Today I'm going to do things without having to post them on FACEBOOK

Today I"m going to do things for Spencer, Kate, Jess and ME!

Today I'm going to do things without expecting a pat on the back or a LIKE or a REPIN.

Today I'm going to stop reading blogs on purpose.

Today I'm going to start being more REAL and tell myself over and over and over that It's good enough, that I"M GOOD ENOUGH. It doesn't have to be perfect.

This is my declaration of Independence from PRETEND-ALTERED-NEGATIVE-EGOTISTICAL-UNREALISTIC.

Sunday, January 5, 2014

Lennon Lou's Quilt

My little neice is adorable and I had fun making her quilt by hand. 

Watching Spencer's 2 day Brompton races in England

 It was fun to use Sarah Jane's Fabric. I have been missing doing stuff by hand so this was really fun to tote around England and work on. I love the binding the best and I think it's because I was taught to quilt by hand. It's peaceful for one as anxious as me.  


Monday, June 3, 2013

Our Quilt is Finished! Hooray!!!

 Jess and I walked over to the barn down the road and asked if we could take a picture of our quilt. The owner was so nice, she not only let us shoot some pics but she brought out her chickens and rooster for Jess. The Barn and home were built in 1839 Holy Moly! We had tons of fun.

This Quilt took almost a year to make. The red block turned out ridiculously red (although this was the recommendation for the fabric). I followed it to a T. This quilt is symbolic of Minnesota for me. Lots of colors and patterns that I love and one big stupid bright red square I hate. Here is the symbolism:
There have been lots of things I really love about living here and a big bright yucky patch of WINTER that I honestly HATE. 6 months + of winter is more than I felt I could take. Needless to say we are looking for jobs elsewhere.  
 I machine quilted the whole thing. It was quite a chore but I really loved doing it. 
  I love the colors especially the (shocking right?) blues.
 Can we just live here on this land?  
 I saved all the little scraps and made fun mini quilt squares to add to the back from where I cut. This quilt is huge and now sits on my bed!  

Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Maryanne's Herringbone Quilt

My Amazing Sister Maryanne 
Maryanne is four years older than me and someone who I really like to be around. She is really funny and loves to have a good time. I love talking with her because we always laugh so hard.

She is so stylish and fashionable and I still to this day dream of going in her closet and having a billion outfits to choose from.

She is amazing. She raised her three boys alone for a lot of years and went to school and has worked to support herself. She graduated and is now working in her field of Occupational Therapy. She has a son who has Asbergers and has advocated for him to get the best schooling he can. She is so smart and knows a lot about the body and the mind and this has helped her deal with some challenges she and her family has faced.
She is patient and cheeful despite the challenges she has been through.
She is so forgiving and this is something that has helped me through my therapy. Her forgivenss of  others is so inspiring to me. I love you Meanne!  
My Inspiration  The Tutorial I used 

This was good Eating Disorder Recovery

I was super frustrated that this didn't turn our perfectly. I used a  material for the grey that was NOT 100% cotton and it stretched as I sewed it. I couldn't get it to line up. I will NOT do that again. 

The way I quilted the front ended up really fun on the back. I really like using flannel. It is so smooth!  I like the hounds tooth pattern. 

Anyone who knows me knows I love polka-dots. I loved the contrast of the yellow and of course had to pick this one. 

Friday, January 11, 2013

Jenny's Nursury Rhyme quilt is finished

 My big sister Jenny and I are just 18 months apart. Jenny loves Vintage. She loves Classic. She loves nursery prints and Jane Austen. She loves Louisa May Alcott. She loves me!!!!!  She is like a little mamma to me. She has guided me with love and faith and has been a support my whole life in all my trials. She is compassionate to me and has more empathy for my pain than most know. I love you Jenny!!!!  Have fun taking this blankie to the park and having indoor picnics on cold dreary days. 

I was talking to Jenny on the phone and complaining that my bedspread that I'm making is taking so long. 6 months and I've only completed 5 of the 9 quilt blocks. I wanted to do something that I could get done fast. That's why I really love making baby quilts.
 I bought this fabric in Utah to make a lap quilt for Jenny. I pulled it out and here it is....only one week later.   
I had so much fun doing a loop-de-loop print.
the back is a little plaid flannel, so cozy

I of coarse added a polka dot border and a red binding.

I picked this fabric up in Utah this past summer and was happy to get to finally use it.